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what maisie knew [22 Nov 2007|10:49am] i see a red door and i want it painted black. thesexaphone new journal. xx 2 comments|post comment

poptarts poparazzi [02 Aug 2007|07:34pm] plain and simple : i love you. my bestfriend, my future. mine. mine. mine. mine. mine. mine. mine? mine. 2 years 2 months. amazing how things work out. 2 comments|post comment

do you wanna know what comes between me and my Calvins? [23 Jun 2007|02:04pm] So when mellie left her camera in my huge bag in a drunked stupor, i uploaded them and now i have her embarrassing pictures in my pc. Can anyone say blackmail? Dollhouse was alright, there's alot of reading into whats not so literal. There were kids watching the PG-18 show as there was brief nudity. There was this kid sitting behind my friend, who kept breathing heavily, which is little freaky. i draw little packets of air when i cannot sleep at night, the stillness of the night and the fragility of my mind becoming two separate entities. Two more days to mid years and instead of scrambling for my life, im reading papers in the afternoon and sipping tea at night. I do walk a little faster and i aspire to be the next economist cus graphs excite me like no other. I am not racist, but there are exceptions. My murakami is traded for hardy, while austen sits back in amusement. I say too much, too little, but i aim to be misunderstood. It gets me how some people are unfriendly sometimes, or maybe its just the society that we are in. I wonder how joanne (aly's cousin) must have felt, turning 21 at the stoke of midnight yesterday. It is true that the only people you ever need in your life are the ones that know you and stick by you even though people say shit  about you, your nose looks weird, you walk funny, your allowance is not $50/day, you suck at life. You tend to be blunt cus you grew up with boys>girls. I talked trash with my brother yesterday, he did something which i felt was so disgraceful(er, something to do with his chinese girlfreind), and this morning it was as though nothing had happened between us. If only Uncle Sam and the fat chinese dragon can get over their little tiff about their trade surplus/deficit. If China is to strengthen their yuen, i can assure you that you wouldnt be better off. But who the fuck cares about economic well being when the environment is at stake and the sad thing is, its the developing countries that will be most hit when their footprint is the smallest compares to an average american. When you were young, you were told to write on both sides of the paper, not waste water and switch off lights and fan when not in use. As you get older, you drive everywhere, leave the computer on overnight, take baths everyday. If the kyoto does not work, what makes you think an article about it will. Yes, we are aware of it. But so what. I remember making a small recyling bin for people in the neighbourhood when i was in pre school. (it was gone the next morning, the garbage man took it away) The japanese recyle everything they can, Singaporeans throws everything they can on the ground as someone will "take care of that". Thats 10 years of "compulsory education", falling, falling, falling on the tarmac. ( DOLLHOUSE. ) 16 comments|post comment

oh penelope are you filled with air [18 Jun 2007|09:47pm] more : http://community.livejournal.com/ohnotheydidnt/13168714.html?#cutid1 post comment

one breath and it all falls down. [14 Jun 2007|12:30am] post comment

Starved for your attention. [05 Jun 2007|01:29am] When i woke up the clock read 4.15 and the shadows on my purple painted walls are gone. The light from the digital clock illuminates my face and it made me squint like a shortsighted five year old. The wind had died and the tree stopped rocking its rhythm lost by the stillness of the night. Tiny shapes float around when i close my eyes and my hairs stand at the slightest touch. I am a dirty old man with long hair who cannot stand girls who cannot stand on their own. I mumble to myself when I sleep, I mumble to myself when I hear you speak. Your words fail me, only because my lids are half closed though its partially hanging on to every drop you say. I held my mug, I held it close to my lips. At that moment, i made peace with mother nature as the air stood still and i feel liberated in every sense that should a gust of wind sweep through me, i would follow it through out the window and onto the asphalt which the government spends millions on each year maintaining. It never cease to amaze me, like how geography is, and how people are. We are all wired differently but we are all the same and you are as weak as your weakest link. I do not get why people do not simply get that and when god gives them something as a favour, they act as though they own it, or the whole fucking world. Oh dear me, who am i to be talking about god, so i shall stop. Hamsters seem to have the perfect lives. Of course, the key word here is seem to. As in seemingly. As in you would not know unless you're in that position. It is indeed easy to assume. You think this way, she acts this way, everything is sorted out like the mail right. Well, I am not a mail, and neither am I defined by the postage stamp of my country. Or the postal address. Or the name next to to. I am a girl, I sound like it, I look like it. So i must like a boy. Who sound like it. Who act like it. And i must have parents, oh yes. They sound like it, they act like it. And well, friends. They sound like it, they act like it. So it brings us to another topic of how these perceptions of things are only seen in our eyes and the other party is supposed to act upon it. But what if the other party is not willing to act upon it. So who's fault is it. My perception of ideas or your (un)willingness to be that person whom i make you to be.  The only person you should trust is someone who has seen you in all seasons, took your heart out and put it for safekeeping. I know mine's that someone who would sing me songs with the guitar and play good music and tell me things about the stars in my eyes. For this, I am truly blessed.  Happy two year baby. Coffeeandcigarettesunderthecanopywithindiemusicplayingloudonthestereo. I will always, always, always love you.  Shakespeare, eat your heart out. 9 comments|post comment

Sid Vicious couldn't even play bass. [31 May 2007|06:32pm] Every once in awhile, you're entitled to make a totally random post that sticks out like a fucking sore thumb among your entries. It could also be a rose among the thorns, if you want to look at that perspective. I'm tired and hingry and totally useless that im waiting for my dad so we could go to some wedding at arab street. Weddings are love, its a celebration of culture and the reuninification of two souls in love. You hear that Austen? I dont blame her though, weddings are a waste of time, food gets thrown, millions of money here and there, and sometimes it takes away the real meaning of marriage itself. So ill just hold on to my other hand while the government decides to legalise non-conformist marriages. Before i forget, Murakami is a genius indeed.  LONG PICTURE POST :D ( Never get so attached to a poem you forget truth that lacks lyricism  ) 18 comments|post comment

oh woe betide. [25 May 2007|10:21pm] So today, while Lady Olivia gave us a little boat experience, this was what happened in the SouthEastern part of our island. 5 comments|post comment

URGENT. [19 May 2007|11:46am] SOMEONE. ANYONE. Tell me where can i get this here cus im such a sucker for trashy magazines. The place that used to sell this shit doesnt carry it anymore and between stuffing my face with candycorn at 10am in the morning, this is sexier than sex. 13 comments|post comment

why do i dig this girl so much. [16 May 2007|09:33pm] obnoxious faggot joy pisses me off. just because hes gay and proud of it doesnt mean the straight should bow down to his obnoxious behaviour. the im-so-gorgeous-and-youre-not attitude for a face of a lizard with balls just doesnt go hand in hand. and seriously i dont know whats up with him standing so close to me whilst queuing up. forcing me to smell his floral scent, feeling his cheerleading moves and hearing him go ladidadida. even the deliberate attempt to purposely stand with my legs wide apart ended up in him stepping my shoe with no words of apology. and shld i start with the female ones? ppl like charlene and her whole lesbian gang sleeping on each other laps whilst others are standing up and singing the sch song during i-day just reflects poorly on them. i just dont understand why they seem to always get away with EVERYTHING with the lamest excuse they get whereas ppl like us who are never late and was only late once got a sarcastic remark from the teacher. amazing isnt it? obviously i laughed my muddy pants off. EDIT : while we're at it, here's a word from avril to you : 26 comments|post comment

she said "you dont know me and you dont even care" [15 May 2007|06:00pm] TUESDAY AFTER SCHOOL. In the liberal multi cultural society today, people have the power of choosing. Being a democratic nation, we excercise the freedom of choosing a political party that would control us.  Ironic isnt it.  Still, in a place where socialising takes a backseat, minor ironies do happen still. Oher than that, it is hard to say that people are plain oblivious to the surroundings. However, that being said, one should not excercise their liberty when it it infringes other's personal space.  In other words, get a life and mind you own fucking business cus we dont care about yours either. Here's a word from Paris [ooh,pun!] :  post comment

crack whore [13 May 2007|09:17pm] 7 comments|post comment

we dont live here anymore [12 May 2007|10:13pm] Today the lopez went shopping with her half her eyebrows hanging by a thread. For the first time in our existence, she bought a lot more than me. A lot more, is really, truly a lot. She splurged on sandals, gifts and whatnots. I just got a pretty little bag for my mom and the cupcake paper for baking project tomorrow. I promise to bring extras on monday for the little girlies who party,dance,run,shop,act,eat and drink orange juice with sacs. Little India is truly amazing, its the little shops and hindi music that gets you. Walk further and you're in Chinatown. I have weird thoughts about it till now. Perhaps its because of these stupid buildings my dad used to drive past when I was younger. These hotels, these girls and thoughts of them coming on too strongly. He would roll the windows down, light up a cig and play some oldies on the radio and we would drown our empty voices in the stillness of the night. This reminded me of yesterday and how he did exactly that, though at the end of the trip he wished that he had not taken me along for I have burnt a huge hole in his pocket. Its a sad thing to live with 3 brothers when you hate men, and how they stink and how they eat like giants cus everything that i OWN goes to their bottomless pit. I do wish for a solitary life in this house. Like how i wish that i was strong enough to carry things and hurl them across just to see the resultant effect and the impact of my strength but all i have is the capacity of words and how i can use them to intensify my intention and purpose. These heart and mind can  finally coexist, seeking attention or cover, using the luxury or words as an instrument. How you speak of music is,of course, entirely orgasmic. I suppose I am shallow like that. Im the biggest fan of your rockband, you rockstar with the sexy hair. And im falling in love with you, all over again, too. I'll buy your two year anniversary album when it comes out next month on the fifth. Cheers. post comment

hello you, hello me. [10 May 2007|10:19pm] im half dead, thought that i would die cus the rice went down the wrong way, i have geog tomorrow oh shit, stretch legs, still hungry, sleepy, in dire need of candy corn. still, i feel persistent need to write about my homeboy whose birthday is tomorrow. Cue loud noises and claps.  I wouldnt have time for him tomorrow, for i dont know I would be. In the castle in the clouds, probably. This is my recollection of him anyways. He has this moustache, quite funny, and it became his trademark. Spanish, as you would have guessed from the moustache mentioned, and has a younger sister.  He majored in the fine arts and yes aly, he is a catholic. His works were displayed once, in Singapore, during the IMF meeting. And yes, he has over 1,500 works of art under his name. He is truly special. Even though he passed away when i was one,  in 1989, his name still lives on. Happy Birthday Mr Salvador Dali. 8 comments|post comment

double tummy ache. [09 May 2007|09:07pm] Crawl around the room, humming the music from Mission Impossible, play rock paper scissors, then accuse your left hand of cheating.  I want a girl who's too sad to give a fuck. post comment

hoeface me misseth thou [04 May 2007|07:12pm] bread and butter. who lives without them. but of course you didnt take that literally, did you? 1 comment|post comment

hoe is sleeping and being pissy. [02 May 2007|07:23pm] [ mood | tired ] OMGZ. get that bitch off him. like omg i so met adam brody and so be jealous bitchezz. good lord. some people only look their age. 5 comments|post comment

all is full of love [28 Apr 2007|09:20pm] you messed up my hair. you messed up my sheets. you messed up my logic. you messed up my heart. 6 comments|post comment

the girl who cried woolf. [28 Apr 2007|12:23am] Let's destroy each other. 'Cause we're too cool for love lines, soft kisses over cheap wine. Smoke me baby like your last cigarette, whisper to me, say you'll never forget. Could you break my heart a little more? Shove my body up against yours & kiss me like you mean it? Anything worth a taste burns as it goes down. Could you tell me I'm so Audrey Hepburn when my hair falls to the side? and say girl, I'm not here to love you tender, I'm just here for the ride. Let's blind ourselves by love & be deaf to all who say it's fatal. It's not that we don't know, its just that we don't care. I wished things were as simple as getting cotton candy at a fair or winning spelling bee. Or maybe that was just a disillutionment of happiness and the real truth behind it was just mere satisfaction and pleasing oneself. Or perhaps I should stop being so selfish and help others attain a certain degree of euphoria, sort of like Mother Theresa. My heart is the seat of emotions; and your lyrical lies sits on it somewhat comfortably and i feel somewhat lonely. I like having my own personal space, and I do not like to pry on other people’s lives unless they mean something to me. Otherwise, I am just being a nosey parker who loves a good gossip from time to time. I just hoped that someday, maybe even for once, that you would walk a mile in my shoes and see the world through my hazel colored eyes. Maybe, just maybe, you would realise that these shoes do not fit. I am well aware that people will always judge me, even when my body is buried six feet under so I gave up trying to please people around me. and she still sits there smiling. regardless of fake friends and dreams that are broken, regardless of the guys she loved and the hearts that were broken. p/s: my silver shadow believer, you make dirty little hearts grow fonder. pps: i miss my dork. i have so many things to tell you, but yet i cant say it. l-o-v-e. ppps: zell should go to hell for making dirty little hearts skip two beats in a row after a match. not forgiven. pppps: i <3 my melle. even when she had curlywurly hair. ppppps: i miss my ra-wr. so many words, so little time. letsgetfuckedupanddie;   1 comment|post comment

para mi corazon [20 Apr 2007|02:52am] "I can listen no longer in silence. I must speak to you by such means as are within my reach. You pierce my soul. I am half agony, half hope. Tell me not that I am too late, that such precious feelings are gone for ever. I offer myself to you again with a heart even more your own than when you almost broke it, eight years and a half ago. Dare not say that man forgets sooner than woman, that his love has an earlier death. I have loved none but you. Unjust I may have been, weak and resentful I have been, but never inconstant. You alone have brought me to Bath. For you alone, I think and plan. Have you not seen this? Can you fail to have understood my wishes? I had not waited even these ten days, could I have read your feelings, as I think you must have penetrated mine. I can hardly write. I am every instant hearing something which overpowers me. You sink your voice, but I can distinguish the tones of that voice when they would be lost on others. Too good, too excellent creature! You do us justice, indeed. You do believe that there is true attachment and constancy among men. Believe it to be most fervent, most undeviating, in F. Wentworth. Such a letter was not to be soon recovered from. Half and hour's solitude and reflection might have tranquillized her; but the ten minutes only which now passed before she was interrupted, with all the restraints of her situation, could do nothing towards tranquillity. Every moment rather brought fresh agitation. It was overpowering happiness. The absolute necessity of seeming like herself produced then an immediate struggle; but after a while she could do no more. She began not to understand a word they said, and was obliged to plead indisposition and excuse herself. They could then see that she looked very ill, were shocked and concerned, and would not stir without her for the world. This was dreadful. Would they only have gone away, and left her in the quiet possession of that room it would have been her cure; but to have them all standing or waiting around her was distracting, and in desperation, she said she would go home. 9 comments|post comment

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